Unresolved Question: What Makes Me, ‘Me’.

Posted in Life Thoughts, Personal
Assalamualaikum,
This is a long, overdued post, I know, but I’m been trying to come up with the precise answer to this question below. I received this question in my Ask.fm inbox about a month ago, and I’m going to try and answer it precisely using this blog post.

Question: I was just scrolling down. and then this little box yearns for my question. hmm. I admire people like you. you know about life more. with your words. you able to make people around you realize about the world. make them think more. hmm. so. i wonder. What made the You today?

A totally cliche answer would have to be, “I am what my past taught me. My experiences and my mistakes made me the person I am now. The things I went through taught me how to react to different situations, the heartaches and the happiness that I experience built me into a better person.“, but then again, that doesn’t really answer the question, right?

When I first read the question, I took a moment or two to think. What actually made me, well, me? What made me into the person I am now?

A few years back, I never have thought I would be where I am now. A few years back, I never have thought that I would be here in INTEC, preparing myself to go to the States. A few years back, I never have thought that I would one day be this involved in the blogging world. A few years back, I never have thought that I would be, well, this awesome. (okay, you can’t blame me for saying this, ’cause I know I’m awesome :P)

I guess, ever since I was a kid, I was the kind of person who would do anything that I want, as long as it doesn’t bother other people. My Mum would always tell us about our childhood habits, and one story that she would keep on bringing up was about when I was small. I was the only girl then (I still am -.-‘) My brother wouldn’t allow me to play with his toys, and would always scold me if I play with them. So every time he goes to school in the morning, I would go to the closet and take out all his toys to play with. And before he comes home, I would put them away at the exact same place so he doesn’t suspects a thing. And he didn’t (I think). It was a win-win thing all together, as I get to play with the toys, and at the same time, he never found out. :3

This habit continues on until now, where I usually go against what other people would normally do. I don’t go with the flow. I walk in my own direction, despite what other people say. I care less about what others think of me, but focus on my goals, what I wanted to achieve. For me, as long as I am not standing in anyone’s way to success, I’m going to march straight up to my dreams and snatch it. Yeah, I’m a badass like that 😛

Two thousand and five. My family moved to London, UK. It was only for a short time period of one and a half year, but it changed me. Tony Bowerman. Sarmad Hasnain. Courtnie Tomlin. Zoe McSweeney. Danny Thomas. Ricky Knell. Bradley Goodey. Ms Lorraine Durrant. I owe these people, and everyone else at Kings Wood School, Harold Hill, for teaching me far more than what I originally expected. Because of their support, their encouragement, their friendship and their love, I became the person I am now. I look at things in a different perspective, I learn to accept changes, I learn to adapt myself to different situations, I learnt how to be human.

Hmm. What else? Oh yeah, let’s not forget my pillar of strength. (Yes, please click that link). It has the details to that answer, to how I became the ‘strong-hearted’ Nazu you see now. I used to be a weak person, trust me. :)

And, of course, you can’t deny the fact that my family has indirectly made who I am now. As the only girl in the family, I kinda get the limelight in everything that I do. Despite that, I have pretty strict parents, so I was pushed to work my ass off for my studies, thus making me a nerd -.-‘ Oh, and I’m a semi-perfectionist, thanks to my Mum 😀

Hmm. Would that answer be enough for you, my dear anonymous, or do you need more explanation? Anyhow, I’m off to bed. It’s 1:30am in the morning, and today (Thursday) is the first day of classes for SUMMER SEMESTER! So, good night all! Assalamualaikum! :)

May 1, 2013
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