Daily30: Dear 16-year old Me

Assalamualaikum,

I forgot to put up a poll for today’s topic, so here’s a quick, random one that I can think of for tonight. This is inspired by so many posts on the internet where people share letters to their past self, and I thought of doing one myself too, of what I would tell my younger self if I could go back in time (to 8 years ago, to be specific) (oh crap now you know my age).

This is 16-yo me, who had just recently discovered the joy of smiling with her teeth showing. And yes, she was wearing braces at that time.

This is 16-yo me, who had just recently discovered the joy of smiling with her teeth showing. And yes, she was wearing braces at that time.

Dear 16-year old me,

I can see that there is a lot on your mind lately, and I know how much it hurts to bottle things up on your own. You desperately need a friend to confide in, but unfortunately for you, there were none. You’re all alone in an alien school, and your then-boyfriend just broke up with you, and everything felt like they were crashing down on you. The pain, the heartbreak, the struggle of keeping it together because you’re Syaza Nazura, you’re supposed to be all OK.

Be strong. Know that it is okay to cry. Know that it is okay to be weak and vulnerable, to feel and to love. Know that no matter how strong you are, you are first and foremost a human being, and it is perfectly okay to fall apart and cry. Give yourself time and space to feel whatever there is to feel, and pull yourself back up on your feet.

Know that you will grow out of it stronger, that the pain will build you up and push you further in life. When you are at your lowest, there is nowhere else to go but up, and believe that you will be able to climb up further because of it. When you look back at all that has happened, you will realize that it all happened for a reason. You may not see it now, but trust me, you will see them soon enough.

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People always say that high school and college would be the best time of your life – where you’ll gain precious memories and friends for life. And while you may long for it to end, to be able to grow up and take charge of your future, do not rush through life. Enjoy your youth as long as you can, as when you grow older, you would not have the freedom nor the time to do as you’d like.

Cherish the time you have with your friends, while you still can. Because as life goes on, those friendships may burn out. Life would tear you apart, and while you can try to sustain as many friendships as you want, sometimes people change and suddenly you would feel like you’re just a spectator in your friends’ lives. Do not regret it, as you would also meet so many new people in your journey in life, and you would find that somehow, the people that you meet at the most random-est time and place would end up being your closest friends in life.

The world is huge – there are endless opportunities for you to pursue and many, many doors for you to open. While you may want to climb up to the top and be the best there is in this world, do remember to take a pause to look at the scenery. Remember to spend time with your family, with your parents and brothers. Remember to spend time with yourself – to spare a moment or two for yourself to enjoy the little things in life.

Invest in yourself and your self-development. Read, write, and talk. Never let go of an opportunity where you can grow to be a better person. Don’t let other people dictate what you’re supposed to do or how you’re supposed to act. Take charge of your life, live it the way you want to live. It is, after all, your own life, so why bother entertaining the nonsense from other people?

Fight the fear in your mind that keeps on telling you “you’re just a nobody”, because my dear self, you are not just a nobody, you are Syaza Nazura, and you deserve the best in the world.

Yours sincerely,

24-year old you.

March 19, 2018
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