Personal

Things changed, and that’s okay.

Assalamualaikum,

It’s been more than 10 years since I started on my blogging journey. I started off with a Blogger blog, much like a lot of other people. My old personal blog was simple – just a collection of thoughts and stories from my daily lives. I wrote about the tournaments I played at, about my friendships, about what I did and saw, about my (failed) past relationships, etc.

Back then, I didn’t worry too much about how things were. I didn’t care about how my blog looks like, or what other people think of the blog. For me, I wrote purely because I wanted to write, and I recall posting one-liner blog posts and other random things. I didn’t worry about getting my blog noticed by other people, because, honestly speaking, who would want to read about the sad, miserable life of a 16-year old me?

But somehow, things changed, mostly in the last 5 years or so. 

You have to know the past to understand the present (Carl Sagan)

I spent some time (read: a few hours) going through my blog journey yesterday, from re-reading my old blog posts on Blogger (which I’ve put on private so that it’s only accessible by me) to going through my WordPress statistics and looking at how much the blog has changed over the last few years.

The biggest difference? I don’t write as much as I used to, that’s for sure. I used to be able to write one blog post per day, or at least a couple of blog posts per week. It was like second nature to me – I could write a short and simple blog post within 30 minutes or so, sometimes even less.

But now?

I’m slowly trying to force myself to write once per week, and even that’s taking me quite some time to get used to. I’m getting better now that I can get into a weekly routine of writing a blog post, but I can’t guarantee that it’d actually stay consistent. I mean, look at my failed #Daily30 series. Or any of the other ‘series’ that I tried to start, but never finished?

My blog entries were also a lot more personal back then – I shared stories about my student life, about my friends, the places that I visited, the events I attended, things like that. Look at where I’m at right now. I can’t even get myself to write about ‘personal’ things because it feels weird to me. Like, okay, why would anyone care about how I spent my day? Or what I ate for dinner today? 

Things changed, but in a way, that’s okay.

I don’t think I’d be able to go back to how it was before. Not that it’s a good idea anyway. Now that I think about it, the blog changed because I’ve changed. My life focus has changed. Instead of writing for the fun of it, I wanted my love for writing to mean something. I want to share it with others, so that it can mean something to someone else too.

And if I can make someone feel better because of it, why not? 

To be honest, I don’t actually know where I’m going with this post. And at this point, I’m just too lazy to go back and edit it. So, yep, if you’re reading this, it means that I’ve reached the “F*** it” point in time and decided to go ahead and click Publish.

It’s almost midnight (at the time of writing), so I better be off. And before you ask – yes, I am still a night owl. It’s just that I have to go to Leeds for work tomorrow morning. That means I have to leave the house extra early to catch the train and walk ~20 mins from the station to my workplace.

Which is fine, actually, because I enjoy the walk. Well, I’m enjoying it now, when the weather’s not so cold yet. Come winter, I’d probably regret it, but oh well. Things you do for some extra pocket money, right? 🙂

Until next time (when hopefully I have a better idea of a blog post), stay awesome <3

p/s – I’m contemplating of restarting my dead vlog. What do you think? If you have thoughts or ideas, so send them in the comments section!

2 Comments

  • Hi! I’ve been a reader since like 2012? (Can’t recall XD) I still remember how you talked about SPM and stuffs and on the other post about how SPM in the end is just a piece of paper. Somehow I enjoyed reading your blog and was inspired by you to do well in my SPM and I slayed it :^) Thank you so much for your blog, haven’t say it before but I feel like saying it on this post. Again, thank youuuu a biggg time !!😄😄

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